Impatience

I never thought that I would be impatient to start a diet, but I am. The only thing between me and my HCG diet is my TOM. For once, I just wish it would come. I'm getting excited about the idea of possibly reaching my goal, ideal weight within a relatively short period of time. Although, in preparation I've been binging--remnants of previous feelings of deprivation, I suppose. Either way, I know that it's all in my head and not physical. I know this because the binges are never satisfying these days--it's almost as if I'm trying to convince myself that I like these foods, but I don't. Experiencing this is cathartic because it's like emptying an attic. Everything that was hung on to because it "might be useful" is turning out to be useless and unsatisfactory. I honestly crave healthy food and force down the junk food when I binge with the excuse of "just in case I was wrong about this before" idea. Fascinating is all I can say. A lifetime of likes being replaced by other likes all because I went on a diet that literally changed me.